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I have a beer belly. A little one. I've always had it, as long as I can remember. Generally I'm an average height, fairly skinny guy, but with a paunch. It's got a little bigger recently, since I had my bike stolen. I'd stopped swimming and then the bike went and I haven't been getting out a whole lot. Combine this with the fact that I eat well and you have paunch. Note, the title of this post is a reference to my flatmates paunch, which has been named. I prefer not to name mine. George is bigger, but then we have different body types anyway.

Anyway I'm a touch narcissistic, so I thought it would be nice to burn that little ridge away. The web is out there waiting, so I searched it for exercises burn abdominal fat. That was a good search, instead of the TRY TH3 AT|<1NSS DIET N0W ads I was expecting, I got some handy stuff.

It's not possible to point at the fat and say "I'M GONNA DO LIKE 10,000 SIT-UPS AND KICK YOUR ASS!" This I could probably have guessed. My favourite quote comes from How to reveal your six pack (which I have no intention of doing): "Abs are not made in the gym, they're made in the kitchen." Well, fuck that then, I have no intention of stopping eating like a king. Now, where are those sausages.

I do actually have an OK diet. My girlfriend takes care of that. I eat meat quite a lot. I don't really know the first thing about food groups and stuff, so I have no idea what to eat when told to get most of my dietary fat from essential fatty acids. I could probably move my diet around a bit, though I would find it hard to adopt any form of regime. I like to try out new food and I'm not really that bothered about the tubbyness to actually work at something.

What I do need to do is more regular exercise. When I had my bike I was riding most days. I would ride for about an hour or so, mostly at a steady clip, but with occasional sprint (still a 15 year old at heart) and at least 15 minutes of slow meandering. I miss my bike and I plan to buy a new one pretty soon. Maybe even tomorrow.

It's quite a surprise that I've noticed the tub getting bigger, I'd never really monitored it that closely. It definitely struck me a couple of times in the last week that it wasn't flattening out so much after meals any more. It's not big, but it is fairly well-defined, one might say protuberant.

I suspect the lack of exercise is the critical factor. I'm eating my normal diet. I haven't actually had a drink this week, although I did drink a fair bit last week. I'm happy to exercise really. I'm more interested in maintaining the general good operation of my cardiovascular system than getting a rock hard six pack for the beach. Although, when I think about it, I'd probably be much happier dying suddenly from a heart attack than losing my mind over forty years. Although I guess you don't actually die that quickly, your body must start getting really crap at stuff long before that.

Last updated at 0:35, Monday December 1st, 2008. All times are shown in 24-hour clock format and are GMT.

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